One night I was having some trouble sleeping so instead of laying there grumpy and sleepless I got up and turned on channel 8. I'd never seen a full blown conspiracy show before and as luck would it have one was on so I set up on the couch with a bowl of Count Chocula and learned all about how my country works, according to the show's producer.
It was interesting to see how the show's producer connected the dots all the way around to show me that a really small group of people are working to mold the world in their own twisted vision. Thank God, I'd thought it was largely a random series of events resulting from billions of people all trying to put food on the table.
People like me with my Count Chocula.
So I started looking around the LC for examples of it. Gadzooks! We have our own super secret domination groups here. I'm not talking about the kind of domination where some hot chick in leather or a teacher outfit lifts your spirits, if you get my drift.
This domination is more like they are convinced they know how to control and mold the social and political landscapes because they figure its all fubar since most of 'em just got here in the past few years and can't tolerate the indigenous culture they invaded.
Only problem is the groups don't have cool names like the groups in the show. I shoveled in a spoonful of the Count's chocolaty deliciousness, focused on it for a minute and considered what these groups would be called if I did a documentary about them like the guy in the TV8 show did.
The paranoid producer got it easy because the groups he was working on were already named and I had to start from scratch. On TV the groups have cool names like 'Illuminati' and 'Bilderger.' They are made up of overlapping groups with shared interests in making sure I don't know jack.
Like the global players, the overarching local group appears to be made up of at least two subgroups with overlaps kind of like a Venn diagram. One of the circles dominated by shrubbers and their entourage and another by people who drool. Combined they comprise a ragtag crew that is convinced that Sheriff Francis is the messiah.
Heres a Venn diagram to illustrate my scholarly efforts.
Shrubbers and Droolers are nice but as names go they lack dignity that will stand the test of time and aren't the kinds of names you'd put in a doctoral thesis so I came up with "Buildabongers" and "Ignorami" to make em sound more highfalutin'.
Here's what that diagram looks like (I spelled Buildabongers phoenetically for the image.)
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